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Formula for finding true love!

Finding a perfect match has now moved beyond astrology and star signs.

Oxford University academicians have developed a scientific formula that will be put to use by the website eHarmony.com.au to find the most compatible match.

This dating service uses the patented ‘Compatibility Matching System’ to find appropriate partners for its members based on their psychological profiles. The website will soon be launched in Australia.

This project is one of the biggest of its kind and involves the study of over more than 700 Australian married couples to develop a country-specific match-making formula. In order to have a first date sanctioned, prospective couples should be matched on “29 key dimensions” such as emotional temperament, social style, intelligence and spiritual beliefs.

According to eHarmony psychologist Dr Galen Buckwalter, the criteria guarantees that couples will have almost an 80 per cent probability of being among the happiest long-term relationships. To get the psychological profile, new members are made to undergo a rigorous assessment that includes 256 questions to determine their personality type, beliefs and values. Then their psychological profiles are processed in a matching system to find potential matches for a successful long-term relationship.

“What we see constantly is that, in general, similarities are much more preferable for long-term relationship satisfaction. It’s not like you are looking for your clone but it does seem that if your basic personality is fairly similar, you have a much better chance of understanding each other emotionally. Some of the formulas we are using in Australia are unique but we don’t reveal the secret sauce; it’s a competitive business,” said Dr Buckwalter, head of eHarmony’s research and development.

He pointed out emotional reactivity or how quickly a person responds with an emotion and socialising habits as crucial factors in finding a good match. However, he ruled out the belief that opposites attract, claiming that this may be true for first glances but not long-term relationships.

“Opposites attract but then they attack. If you are different in fundamental traits, you seem to spend a lot of emotional energy working out differences,” he said

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MIND YOUR THOUGHTS

Personal GrowthHave you ever thought about the fact that there is never a moment when you are not thinking—that whatever happens in this world begins with a thought? Here are five simple steps to help you manage your thoughts and achieve success and happiness in life

BE AWARE OF YOUR THOUGHTS
Start watching your thoughts, without identifying with them. Watch them as a detached observer.

You may even get carried away by your thoughts. Never mind. It is natural—especially for a beginner. What you need to do, whenever you detect this, is to take yourself out of your thoughts immediately and get back to the process of thought-watching once again as a detached observer.

Do not get perturbed by your thoughts. Don’t condemn or justify them. Don’t try to control them. Just watch them. After some time, you will come to know what your negative thoughts are about. Now concentrate on all the positive thoughts that you can replace these thoughts with, in order to switch over to a more positive attitude towards them. Our attempt should be to cut down the quantity of unnecessary thoughts and to improve the quality of the necessary ones. Keep yourself busy. Simple food, deep breathing and relaxation exercises also help manage your thoughts easily. Expect less from others. (more…)

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